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Honey,
There are just some moments in your life that you are going to have to feel your way through if you want to bring healing and transformation.
That’s it. Feel your way through.
No matter how much you want to understand it, analyze it, dissect it, read your way around it. You are going to have to feel it.
No matter how many retreats, practices, breathing exercises you have to move you into uplifted or relaxed states. You are still going to have to feel it.
Eventually.
And that means sticking with the discomfort that comes when you’re not used to slowing down.
Cause it gets uncomfortable to slow down to the unknown. The parts that you’ve ignored while reading through chapters of what you think your problems are. Or enjoying the tingles of feeling expanded consciousness post-practice.
You know what to call it, you’ve done therapy, and know your story.
You’ve done the breathing, the meditations, practices, felt some of the loving spaciousness that exists.
And yet deep down still live with that nagging truth that not much has changed. You’re still stuck in that same old loop of avoiding your pain. Avoiding the discomfort of facing your truth. And even though you now understand that you’re doing it. You’re still stuck.
Why? Because you are not slowing down to feel.
And I mean slowing the Fuck down.
Becoming aware of the parts of you that are pushing you to avoid. Embracing the shadow. The judgmental parts. The parts that don’t fit into the vision of what you think you are, or want to be.
Pushing you to continue reading. Pushing you to understand and analyze. Pushing you to take care of others. Pushing you to cover your feelings with words and stories. Pushing you to do whatever you it is that you do to fool yourself. To avoid.
And that means getting real with yourself. Breaking through the superficial. Taking responsibility for your fullness. The dark and the light. The ugly and the sparkling.
There’s no fast-forward button to this kind of work. I repeat, there is NO fast-forward button that if you do this or that thing then you'll be healed.
There’s no answer to how long it will take. That depends solely upon you. Sticking with all parts of you. Taking time to get comfortable with yourself first. Welcoming yourself beyond the crackling surface that is too often patched up using incredibly powerful practices, yoga, energy sessions, mindfulness and meditations as a band-aid.
Thereby, again, avoiding.
Things can only flow when we acknowledge, embrace and feel into them. Going into the depths so you can hold space for your fullness.
And yes, all of those modalities and practices and tools can support. But not if you're only using them to soothe. To pacify yourself into your ongoing map of the world.
So, take a deep breath love. Feel the sensations of that breath. Close your eyes for a moment and feel what it is to relax your eyes in this moment. Feel the clothes on your body and what it feels like. The parts of your body that make contact with whatever you are sitting, laying, standing on. Feel how gravity works on your body. And just let yourself be for these coming moments.
What were you avoiding to feel inside of yourself when you decided to distract yourself with this blog?
Go there, be there. Gift this moment to yourself as an act of self-love.
See you soon.
One love,
Juel
Juel helps women and non-binary queens re-connect with their inner source of power to create authentic and passionate lives. Creating transformational journeys back to essence.